Remembering Alexa

Alexa and I met in high school our freshman year. They have been a constant friend in my life from then on. They always were willing to help me learn to grow and be a better person then and even now. I always remember that they could find and befriend an animal no matter where we were. Maybe at a party at someone’s house or a stray on the beaches of Puerto Rico. Their love of all creatures small and large will always be inspiring. They touched the world in the best possible way in their short time here.

Alexa will always be the role model everyone looked up to. She changed so many people's relationships with their dogs for the better 💖 She taught us about value in everything we do and that we need to embrace the moment. Alexa worked tirelessly even at the expense of her health to make things better to change things. Alexa had accomplished so much in the short time she had on Earth and the world is a bittersweet place without her here. She was a serious advocate for the disabled community and a huge support for advice for so many handlers. Alexa, We'll miss you every day since you've been gone But we know you're watching over us and Sal and Idgie will always be treasured by your family and Tyler 💖

I didn’t know Alexa in person, I was just a follower of the Instagram account HerdynHappy. I just wanted to say that their account was very powerful. It made me understand so much, it made me think about the type of dog guardian and human I should strive to be. Some people have the ability to create change around them and some people have the ability to create change from afar. It was very clear from Alexa’s account that they did both thoughtfully and passionately.

Lex has forever affected the way I advocate for dogs and accessibility. They were endlessly kind and generous. Although we never met, we spoke almost daily. I knew their voice and their face. I gave daily updates to my family on what Sal and Idgie were up to today. Losing Lex is a compounded loss for me, as I’m losing their dogs too. I will forever miss Lex’s fierce advocacy, gentle heart, and bright spirit. Everyone who knew them was lucky to know them, whether it was for a day, a year, or many years. ❤️

I was a silent admirer of Lex's instagram handle. They didn't know me personally or even know of me but they made a huge impact on the way I look at dog guardianship. I would everyday look for Lex's posts mainly for wisdom but also for the funny quirks that they shared about Sal, Idgie and Kala. On one hand their posts about K9 brutality and accessibility in social media and life in general made me ponder and question things I didn't think about before, but also their posts of Sal throwing his own poop bag was the highlight of my day. Lex's posts inspired me to be a better guardian to my own pup and just to live with a beautiful lens with just kindness. In the few months that I followed them, they impacted me in ways that I didn't even know. I will always keep Lex in my heart and I am soo glad to have found the corner of the internet where they existed. You dont know of me Lex but you inspired me with every share , post and thought and I can only strive to be a wonderful and caring dog guardian as you were. Love always Shaloma and Layla

Alexa was one of the first to accept me in the service dog community. Working a deaf dog is mostly looked down upon, but they welcomed Casper and I with open arms. Alexa will be missed greatly, we hope that she rests in peace.

I never met Alexa but I have so much admiration and kinship for anyone like her -- who pours their heart into helping others. In so many ways she is still with us; her legacy of helping animals and people will live on forever in both the people and animals she's helped, the projects she's started, and all the activists she's inspired. RIP.

Lex’s eyesight began to struggle around the same time my hearing began to struggle. Because of that, Lex decided that I would be the eyes to their ears and they would be the ears to my eyes. “Together, we’ll be like half a person with our consciousness and senses, it’s great.” This is how Lex^2 (Lex squared) was born. On the topic of finally being able to live in the same state at the same time: “We are dangerous together and living in the same state will be bad for everyone. Except Idgie and Frida who thrive on chaos.” Not a quote, but a memory. Because Alexa and I lived across the country from each other, we had to get creative with ways to spend quality time together. And thus, FaceTime dog party dates were born. Lex with Sal, Ig and on occasion other animals and fosters, myself with Pluto, Frida, Sapphire, Erik and any addition of fosters or horses. Oh, this is my favorite. For the longest time, Lex thought my Chinese Crested hospice foster, Erik, was my husband. And they were so confused, they could’ve sworn I didn’t have one, but they genuinely thought that when I talked about Erik, I was talking about my husband. Lex was up north for the duration I had Erik, and I was in Texas, so they never got to see him in person and were solidly convinced that my husband was: Erik Assenheimer. Lex was the other half of Lex^2, and I couldn’t have made it through the last few years without them. Absolutely could not have gotten through without their support, friendship, assistance and unconditional love. They were just as present through the lowest lows as they were in the good and stable periods. Tough times didn’t scare them. If anything, it made them more determined to love harder. When Toast was nearing his last days, Lex let him eat to his heart’s content. And that meant he ate pancakes and Ol’ Roy for about a month straight. Apparently, the toots were terrible, but Lex let him live his days in happiness! If that ain’t love, I don’t know what is. A few years ago, I was mauled by two dogs and my arms were left a bit mangled and my soul a bit more so. And this is what Lex had to say about it, and it sticks with me daily: “I’m glad the dogs didn’t kill you and instead gave you cool ramen noodle arms (which are, in fact, my favorite noodles). But seriously, you’re a phenomenal human. And the universe is better with you in it.” I could go on, but these are some of my favorite memories. Lex will forever be “The Other Lex” and Lex^2 will always remain.

In 2018, my mouse Keeper was quite ill and had seen multiple doctors who informed me that it was an end-of-life situation. Keeper was not doing well and would not eat much of anything, except for some sweet treats. I was quite sad, and then came Alexa who, without hesitation, volunteered to take Keeper to a more capable facility in Long Island that could do a closer examination. Alexa was very sympathetic and encouraged me not to give up. Because Alexa worked in the clinic, Alexa would be to save me the trip and a little bit of discount. I was making minimum wage at the time, so it was a lot of help. Unfortunately, Keeper died on the way to the clinic. However, I could tell Keeper was treated with great care by Alexa who wrapped Keeper carefully and drove him to my house, which really helped me to cope. Alexa was a kind and exceedingly generous person. The world has lost someone truly special.

I did not know Lex personally, but the information they shared, and how they shared it has helped me to understand and love my dog better. I’m so grateful

I will always cherish the conversations we had about how similar our rescue pups are, watching them both flourish. I met Idgie as a puppy and Lex was the most perfect fit and I delighted in seeing such a special dog with a treasured friend. I’ll miss our chats about advocacy, they emboldened me repeatedly to take a stand in my community and inspire change. Their passion and empathy for people and animals will continue to burn in me. I’ll miss their humor, I’ll miss the rambling voice messages we’d swap while doing chores. I’ll miss swapping enrichment ideas. I want to honor Lex’s memory by emulating their tenacious empathy and determination to bring positive change in the lives of people and animals.

Alexa was one of my closest friends in the anxiety-inducing, cringey middle school/early high school years. She was one of those people who you could naturally be yourself around without fear of judgement or ego which made her an outlier in the best way. I remember always being at her house listening to Ke$ha embarrassingly loud, running around the neighborhood with friends like early teen hooligans do, and, of course, checking out Omegle for the thrill of it. My freshman year of high school I tried out for the Volleyball team and was cut from tryouts, but our friend Haley convinced me to join the cross country team with her, Alexa, and some other friends. This was a terrible idea for me since I have asthma and vocal cord dysfunction, but I remember Alexa encouraging me after practices and races, and never making me feel like I was out of the ordinary even though I was quite literally always last to finish on the C team. Due to the joys of divorce and parents re-marrying, I transferred high schools my sophomore year. Alexa and I stayed in touch for a little bit, but as life went on we drifted apart. From when we first became friends, I saw her passion for animals and was always amazed with how much she cared and how strong her values were. I always envied her drive and wished that I could be like her in those ways. As time went on I'd watch her posts on social media and saw the incredible work she continued to do for animals who needed care, and her strong advocacy for accessibility, and general human rights. Unfortunately, I can't find any photos of us from that time -- probably because of strategic Facebook cleanups -- but I'll always remember our photo shoots in her bathroom mirrors with our digital cameras, being the absolute coolest of kids in Prairie Village. I was so incredibly sad to read this news and I'm feeling all the things, but focusing on the joy and pride that I was lucky enough to be Alexa's friend if only for a small amount of time.

I didn’t know Lex personally but followed them on Instagram. Their content and how they used the platform to speak out and educate had a profound impact on me, and by proxy, my beloved dog. I will forever be grateful for their fierce advocacy for both humans and animals, and their incredible demonstration of what consent based learning /force free training can do. I had already bought into positive reinforcement but They really made me recognize to sky is truly the limit with it. I firmly believe that my relationship with my best friend, my pup, is stronger because of Lex.

Lex asked for photos of dogs getting treats “just for existing” a few months back; it really made me think about the value in just loving our animals for being with us. They talked about their relationship with Sal (and Idgie) in such amazing ways as being so grateful for everything he did for them, from existing to tasking, and it made me so happy, and fully reminded me to always keep that in mind. Keeping my dogs in the party with me will always be something I think about because of Lex, and I owe them so much for it.

Lex always taught me that we and our dogs are doing the best we can with the information we have, there’s always room for growth and change, and oh my did they treat me and my dogs with gracious kindness. My dogs, my career, and myself personally would not be as great and impacted without knowing Lex for the almost two years we were friends.

Lex helped me find a proper diagnosis that literally changed my life. They helped me and my dog recover after a pretty serious attack. They paid for my therapy when i was in crisis and couldn't afford it to stay safe. They checked in on me regularly. They offered a lot of training advice, and pictures of Sal just being a goofball when I needed cheering up. We swapped ugly photos of our dogs whenever we needed a pick-me-up. They said they wanted to meet my dog, and I'm sad they never got to. I'm so sorry i drifted recently, Lex. You know how mental health goes though. I love you, sal, idgie, and was so hopeful for you with Kala. I hope you know I thought the world of you. The world is so much darker without you, but brighter from your influence. Life sucks. I miss you already :(

When I saw the news my heart dropped. I couldn’t believe what I was reading. I’ve been following herdynhappy for a few months now. I think I found their account last fall and have been religiously keeping up on Lex’s posts, reels, and stories ever since. That’s just how GOOD their content is. I urge everyone to go look at their page if you haven’t already. The amount of information and learning that I was able to takeaway from a single post was and still is unlike any other account. It wasn’t just about dogs, it was about dogs, humane training, inclusivity, advocating for humans, animals, and dogs alike, and so much more. Lex’s captions spoke millions. I read the news when I was studying with my study buddies. I teared up every time a story or post popped up acknowledging Lex’s impact on the R+, service-animal, amongst other communities. I held it in, but the moment I got back to my room I sobbed. Big fat tears. I didn’t know Lex on a personal level. Just a few exchanges via DMs. It was more one-sided than not. Lex was nothing short of a role model for me. They educated me and made me want to do better as a human - to other humans and as a human - to dogs. They changed the way I saw certain things. Their stories were something I looked forward to everyday. Goofy Sal, Idgie playing with trash, Kala eating Lex’s arm, and most importantly, Lex’s thoughts. I tear up thinking about the last story they uploaded a few days ago. I’m grieving what this community has lost and grieving the amazing human Sal, Idg, and Kala has lost. I pray that they thrive in their new homes as they did with Lex and pray for those who were close to them. I am grieving with you. Thank you for doing what you did and being an amazing person, Lex. You won’t be forgotten and I will always strive to be even a quarter of who you were. 💛🕊

A few years ago, I found an abandoned baby rat struggling to move on a New York City sidewalk. I brought them home and got to feel like a hero for rescuing them, but Alexa was the actual hero of the story. She nursed Squid back to health and cared for him for years. As far as I could tell, Alexa was not interested glamorizing the relatively simple and temporary sacrifice of taking animals out of harm’s way. Unlike me, she wouldn’t have taken a second to pat herself on the back for rescuing Squid—she would have done it without a second thought—and it would have probably felt completely ordinary and routine to her, because it was. Unlike me, she was a devoted caregiver—not just trying to “save” animals, but determined to give them lives worth saving; determined to make the painstaking daily sacrifices that really matter. Alexa, my heart aches for you. You gave so much more kindness than you ever received. You gave so much more life than you ever got to live. Your friends are wiser and kinder and more dedicated because of you and we will try our best to live up to your example and create the world that you deserved.

When I see all of the current Cornish cross chickens at my sanctuary Penelope’s Place, I see Alexa in them. She was involved in some way in each of their rescues. Alexa was a fierce animal warrior and an amazing care-giver! There are very few that I would trust with my animals in the same way that I would with her. I will always remember her warm smile and the way she would light up when spending any time with an animal. She made a huge impact on this world during her short life and will be greatly missed.

Alexa and I were friends and worked together briefly. Her love and passion for rescuing animals gave a beautiful kitty named Lady a forever home, and I will never forget chicken sitting for Fernanda.

I didn’t know Alexa in person, and I don’t remember how we connected in the online community. I always appreciated Alexa’s perspective. We had great conversations about social justice and NYC. Alexa was a rare gem of a human. I am so sad, and the world is less without them.

“How do I create a party big enough for my dogs to want to join in?” And “When you have a garbage day, don’t take it out on your dog. Find happiness with your dog.” are my favorite Lex quotes. I didn’t know Lex personally and we only talked a few times. But I loved every word they said and it changed my life. I first learned who Lex was when someone shared a post of theirs with Idgie. Idgie looks so much like my dog, Shalene. Lex taught me on a personal level how important accessibility is. And about how to truly love a dog. Lex also showed so much kindness to me, by gifting me Idgie’s old “reactive dog” vest. I’m so grateful for that gesture and the conversations we had. I miss you, Lex.

I only knew Lex very briefly over the past couple years. Our connection was confusing and chaotic like most things in our lives, but even in the most brief period of knowing them, they left such a large impression on my life. I was honestly gobsmacked with the news just now and to say I am devastated would be a ginormous understatement. Forever thankful for even that small amount of time knowing them.

Lex influenced so many people & dogs through their Instagram including myself and my dog, Shadow. The way they described their relationship with their dogs was always so beautiful. The way they viewed the world with their dogs was so beautiful. I'll never forget that and see the world that way too thanks to Lex. I'm so grateful to have known them even for a short time online. I will always miss seeing Sal, Idgie and Kala on my feed. I see Lex's words about Sal in my mind when Shadow tries to climb a tree after the scent of a squirrel and I let him, "This bud gives me the world. I can give him a couple minutes of looking silly yelling at a tree".